How To Stop Going In Circles
Does anyone remember that song by The Friends of Distinction? Here are the lyrics if not:
I did not realize how depressing that song was until now. I heard it a lot growing up, and it was one my grandmother played often. It has been well over ten years since I heard it, but it seemed to find its way back to the forefront of my mind as I wrote this blog. It goes perfectly with the dream I had, which led to the writing of this blog. So before you continue, go ahead and pull it up on YouTube; I am sure you want to if the tune has not flooded your mind already.
Several days ago, I had a dream I awoke from immediately reflecting on my life. A young lady was driving a vehicle in the dream. It appeared she was on her way to work because she was well dressed; there was a bag with folders in it, a luxury SUV, and a glow. The weather appeared excellent, but just when I thought she was about to arrive at her destination, the dream started over from the beginning, and the weather had changed. I saw the same scene; the only difference was the weather, and her demeanor had changed. I was puzzled as I laid there looking into her life as if I was there. Then it happened again. This time she feared running off the road. I could feel her emotional spiral as she turned on her defrost, hoping her eyes would correct quickly. At this point, I awoke panicked as if I had been driving around in circles. A feeling that I kept ending up in the same place gripped me. I grabbed my journal and began to write what I saw. I needed to figure out how this applied to my life and what changes I needed to interrupt the cycle. Here is a lady who looked fine on the outside, seemed to have all the material possessions, yet she was circling. Some area of her life was not progressing. With each scene and each change of the weather, I experienced a different emotion from her. They were not separate but a different one each time in addition to the previous one. The way she felt was hard to explain, although I was familiar with it. I have felt that way too. I have felt that way a lot. As it appeared, she was on her way to work, so I could conclude that her career path was the area in her life needing the shift.
After meditating about this dream, I realized I, too, had been circling in different areas of my life. As hard as I tried to do it differently, I ended back in the same position. The pretend had worn off. I knew then this was deeper than just "praying it away." There was a root to this, so I sought help to remove the blocks. I had to seek help outside of my norm. I had to seek help that would help me out of the pit with strategy, not sink me further with "you got to trust God' "have faith," or the classic "put on the mind of Christ" without clarifying how. I understood I had to pray and seek divine guidance on what route to take to break these cycles, and my answer came just as fast as I prayed it. Not only did it come with every level of healing I needed, but my instructor also manifested. I was ready, and the help was made available to me. Negative self-talk, lack of belief in my abilities, low self-esteem, rejection, abuse, and seeds sown as a child in my subconscious were some of the reasons why I was living my life on repeat. To sum it all up, my mindset was the culprit. I would not see progression until I opened up about how I truly felt and why. Have you ever been in a car with someone who never listened to an entire CD, they just heard one song, liked the outcome, and kept it playing over and over and over? Well, so have I, I have even been that person. Time for a new song! Time to stop getting so comfortable and understand discomfort comes with an expansion. Healing will not be a walk in the park. We get comfortable thinking that this is all there is; we fear change and embracing the unknown, we put ourselves in a cycle of procrastination because we do not want to make decisions for our lives. We say we are "waiting on God" when we use spirituality to bypass doing what God has already made it clear to do. We fool no one but ourselves, and we miss out. We get so programmed and rehearsed that we miss opportunities to be present in every moment and rewire our brains. If you drive the same way to work every day, you are on autopilot. You are not tapping into your brain areas because you are not learning anything new today. Fear and unprocessed pain have trapped us. The young lady probably wanted to start her own business, but fear of missing out on something or making the wrong decision kept her circling.
1. Take a step in a different direction. If you do the same thing every day, the same way, start by interrupting that pattern. If you usually come home after work, try working out. Doing this not only helps interrupt cycles in your mind, but it will raise your vibrations.
2. Seek God for the help you need, and when it comes packaged differently from what you imagined, embrace it. I have worked with a therapist and two coaches to get where I am, and I still have room to grow.
3. There is more to uproot than you realize; prepare for a continual process. It is all worth it as you see the real you birth forward. You are not your pain! You are not what you saw growing up. You are not what people have said about you. You are somebody even though they abandoned you. You are loved, even though they chose your sibling over you. You do not have a bad attitude because you are angry, and that's how you express it.
4. Affirm yourself. You are smart; stop shutting down because you are not comfortable with your voice. There is a plan and a purpose for you; dig deep for it. Under everything life has thrown at us, the "Before I formed you, I knew you" is shining bright. Permit yourself to think differently.
5. Invest in a counselor and a coach to help you recalibrate. Accountability and collaboration are robust. You owe this to yourself.
Thank you for reading this article. Please share on your platforms. If it has sparked something and you need further help breaking patterns that keep you circling, schedule a FREE clarity call with me today.