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Stop Overstaying Your Welcome in People’s Lives

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Several weeks ago, I had a dream that felt too real to ignore. The emotions I carried inside that dream followed me into waking life. I was in shock, quiet, processing, tears falling, pen moving across paper, and new intentions being set. My spirit urged me to pull out the index cards I use for burning ceremonies. That’s how heavy this dream was. In it, I was spending time with people I thought were for me. It was the usual: laughter, games, staying over. But this time, I was met with an attitude that cut deep. I was questioned about why I stayed, and I was told I could have easily gone home. The words weren’t even as sharp as the energy behind them. I was left hurt, confused, trying to make sense of something that could have been communicated with kindness. In the dream, I remember thinking: If I’m not welcome, I’ll never return. And when I opened my eyes, I shut them again just to sit with it. That’s when I heard it, clear and undeniable: “Stop overstaying your welcome in people’s l...
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Healing or Hiding? The Thin Line Between Avoidance and True Recovery

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  For a long time, I thought I was healing. I had cut ties with my family. I had moved forward, built my own stability, and promised myself I would never look back. In my mind, that was healing: walking away, refusing to engage, and closing the door on those who caused me pain. But years later, a trigger hit me so hard it knocked the wind out of me. That’s when I realized: I wasn’t healing, I was avoiding. Avoidance feels like healing because it creates space. It gives you breathing room. But it doesn’t deal with the wound; it just covers it up. I was living with unprocessed pain that resurfaced the moment life pressed the right button. And when that trigger showed up, all the anger, grief, and hurt came rushing back. That’s when I knew: it was time to start over. This time, not with avoidance, but with healing. I leaned into resources I once overlooked: therapy, journaling, holistic practices, and the guidance of coaches. Slowly, I stopped running from my pain and started facing i...
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The Rare Love Language

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We’ve all heard about the five love languages: words of affirmation, acts of service, quality time, gifts, and physical touch. And while those are important, I believe there’s another one that rarely gets the spotlight: consideration . Consideration is a love language that doesn’t sparkle with grand gestures. It doesn’t always show up in roses, trips, or expensive gifts. It lives in the small, intentional acts that say, “I thought about you. I factored in your feelings. I cared enough to consider you.” And yet, considerate people are rare. When you find them, you know. They make space for you without you having to beg. They remember the details you barely mentioned in passing. They take your feelings into account, even when it’s inconvenient for them. Sadly, I’ve realized how rare this really is. I haven’t encountered true consideration in a long time. And I wish I had known then what I know now that when someone shows you consideration, you should treasure them, because it is indeed a...
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Generational Ache: How Unhealed Pain Becomes Legacy

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  The water was calm, and so was I. There’s something about being submerged just me, the steady sound of my breath, and the gentle sway of the water that allows my mind to slow down. Swimming has always been my sanctuary, a place where clarity seems to find me. That day, clarity came in the form of a download I didn’t expect. It wasn’t something I thought applied to me, but I couldn’t shake it. The thought was simple, yet heavy: Some women want to have a man’s child because of how he loves his children. Not out of love for him, but because seeing him nurture his kids awakens something deep within them, the ache of a little girl who never felt cherished by her father. When I sat with that thought, it unraveled something profound. For some women, bearing his child isn’t just about starting a family. It’s about birthing the inner child she’s been carrying, hoping that in raising his baby, she’ll finally receive the love she’s always craved. It’s not strange when you really think abou...
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Awakened by Realizations

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Realizations they come to open our eyes, but sometimes, I want to close them again. They hurt. They’re sharp. They are truths wrapped in barbed wire that tear through illusions you prayed would stay intact. Realizations they sit heavy in your chest, an ache prescription painkillers can’t even touch. The doctor thought ibuprofen would do the trick, but they only “practice” medicine while I practice breathing through heartbreak. Realizations they can freeze a heart that once overflowed with grace. Knowing you were good to people only to be played that kind of betrayal activates a side of you you sometimes can’t come back from. Realizations they make you question everything: every “friend,” every “I love you,” every moment you thought was safe. They make you question yourself, too, and the parts of you that tolerated, that forgave, that kept hoping. But here’s the thing about realizations: they are not stumbling blocks, though they trip you. They are not...
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When Helping Hurts: Lessons From Building, Coaching, and Letting Go

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As I cleaned up my Canva creations, I stumbled across so much of myself. Wisdom tucked into graphics. Jewels hidden in unfinished workbooks. Journal pages I left behind. I once created entire coaching materials for clients who wanted to turn their expertise into books. I paused. Memories surfaced, both good and not so good. I remembered the team of coaches I once built, the books we wrote together, and how my anthology process was unmatched. Smooth. Organized. Clear. If anyone felt lost, it was never because the system failed; it was because they didn’t read the posts, expected me to do the work for them, or simply didn’t care enough to follow through. And then the sting hit me: I had given people everything they needed to succeed, and yet some still refused to take hold. Some saw me not as a guide, but as competition. That season was wild. I worked alongside business owners who claimed they wanted to help others, yet couldn’t create their own content. Many wanted everything handed to ...
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